These that few weeks have been a whirl wind. I think that is putting is lightly. From the time I wake until the time I lie my head on the pillow, I think my mind spins, with only the ability to focus on what is right in front of me. I’m not sure if that is a blessing or a curse but somehow some way we make it through to the next day.
When I say that last few weeks, I might as well say that last 19 months. Some people might take on this motherhoods think with the ease of getting dressed every morning. I however feel, that I consistently have to work at it and by work, I mean WORK and struggle at it. At the moment of writing this I had to bribe my 6 year old, yes, I bribed her, with the opportunity to watch a UTube Kids, just so I could have a few moments of calm.
Now might I add that my day started at 530 is the morning with this same said 6 year old, vomiting uncontrollably and our 19 month old appearing to be coughing up everything and anything that might be in his chest. Needless to say, church as a big NO, and we have been cooped up inside for what feels like an eternity.
Most days this would make me go subtly crazy. Overwhelmed to say the least, however in the moment, life is… just what it is.
What was different about today? I just didn’t care. My normals quiet time, gone. In its place were back rubs and snuggles. Our laundry continues to be in mounds (yes, I failed to mention, our new machine picked today of all days not to work) and my trip to the gym will have to wait until tomorrow.
Today, I will steal away small little moments for myself. I will feel the ping of my Apple Watch when it says to breath. Lavender will be my friend. I will bask in the sunshine brightly coming through the windows, warm and strong — a sign of days to come.
I will live through the moment as a chance to just be. To do nothing except tend to the needs of the little humans that need me. As we get through today, with sick bellies and runny noses, we know that one day these days will end. One day these amazing humans will not need me, us or anyone for that matter and all there will be is calm. For now, we will steal this moments, short as they might be because calm comes from within.